So, today was April’s birthday get together. There was plenty of food cooked; from steamed crabs to fried catfish to even grilled BBQ chicken. I helped out as much as possible, but my mind was preoccupied with one thing and one thing only:
Meeting the rest of her family.
I’ve never had a problem with meeting my significant other’s family. The last 3 times I had to do so, it was smooth sailing. They liked me; I was as personable as possible and answered all of their questions as concise as one could. I liken it to that all important 2nd interview for a job: you got the qualifications, but let’s see if you got the real personality and not that “I need a job” personality.
However, today made me feel like I was meeting the Fockers.
After meeting her mom’s close friend (who tried to call me young and school me on how to light a grill), I had to meet her aunt and uncle and cousins. Now, her uncle was cool and very old school in his approach: shake hands, tight grip, eye contact, short and to the point question and answer session, and a nod of approval. It was the other folks that attempted to have me shook. Her aunt and cousins came with an agenda, and that was to grill me to perfection. Question after question, side eye after side eye: it felt like I was in the middle of a federal interrogation. Constantly I was reminded that if I don’t treat April right, they wouldn’t hesitate to fuck me up.
I kept my composure and answered as cooily as possible. Ultimately, I had won out; with the exception of one cousin that I had met a year ago, everyone seemed to like me with her. (That one cousin doesn’t think too highly of me because she thinks I don’t look like I belong with April. She told me as much at her twin daughters’ birthday party last summer. She could’ve been joking, but a lot of truth is said in jest.). I’m just relieved that it’s over.
April had a good time, and that’s all that matters. She’s asleep right now; she had a pretty long day. I know that when I depart from here that her interrogation from them about me will begin. I’m the new topic of discussion in her family now.
They are going to make me a dead horse and then continue to beat me.
(Later, I’ll post every single question they asked me, including if I wanted to marry her and when are we having kids.)